Thursday, October 12, 2006

Ave, Nomad!

I don't normally slap girlie pics on my blog because we're all about dignity and propriety here at the Hairy Chasms. But I do have to salute the Nomad for having displayed some choice images of my girlfriend, Garrett Honeywell Ghost (née Geist):


My girl's a freak. She can lick the pimples off a cucumber, and she's definitely a "flower child" of the Liz Phair School, to wit:

Every time I see your face I think of things unpure, unchaste
I want to fuck you like a dog
I'll take you home and make you like it
Everything you ever wanted
Everything you ever thought of
Is everything I'll do to you
I'll fuck you and your minions, too [sorry; no sloppy seconds]
Your face reminds me of a flower
Kind of like you're underwater
Hair's too long and in your eyes
Your lips a perfect "suck me" size
You act like you're fourteen years old
Everything you say is so obnoxious, funny, true and mean
I want to be your blowjob queen
You're probably shy and introspective
That's not part of my objective
I just want your fresh, young jimmy
Jamming, slamming, ramming in me
Everytime I see your face I think of things unpure, unchaste
I want to fuck you like a dog
I'll take you home and make you like it
Everything you ever wanted
Everything you ever thought of
Is everything I'll do to you
I'll fuck you till your dick is blue


Garrett likes to wear clothing with her name on it because then she doesn't have to remember what her name is: she need only look down. This doesn't always work, though: she gets distracted by her own magnificent chest from time to time and forgets there are words on it. Then again, I'd be distracted, too, if my chest looked like that.

As you can see from how she looks, Garrett's from somewhere east, but a few of my friends keep asking her whether she's carrying a bit of Nigerian blood. OK, granted, Garrett likes a sex position she calls "the Hot Four-One-Nine," but I don't think that's proof of a Nigerian pedigree.

You'd never know it to look at her, but Garrett's pretty good with a bullwhip and handcuffs. My girl.


_

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