I'm focusing on having "grammar" explicitly in the new Substack title and alliterative if possible. I'm also tilting more toward notions of carping, complaining, grumbling, and growling to reflect the bitter old fart I am. That would fit the tone of the Bad Online English newsletters. The ones I like more than average are highlighted.
Grandpa’s Grammar Gripes (I really liked this at first)Grammar Gramps (Grammar Cramps?)
Grammar—Graceful and Gruesome (captures the highs/lows of the language I employ)
Grandiloquent Grammar (too pretentious)
Grammar’s Gristle and Other Things (one of the few titles acknowledging I do other stuff)
Grammar Without Gravitas (hmmm...)
Grammar Grief (this captures my desolation)
Grammar Without Grief (optimistic spin, maybe too friendly)
Greed for Grammar (sounds almost too much like Blessed Rage for Order)
Greasy, Grimy Grammar Guts (a naked appeal to childhood)
grammar, ungridlocked (too weird... ungridlocked?)
Grammar Grievance (I like this one even better than Grief, above)
Grilled Grammar (grammar as a slab of protein to be cooked and eaten)
Fresh-grilled Grammar (variation... maybe Freshly Killed...?)
Grim Grammar (this appeals to my dark side)
Grimmer Grammar (I like this one—highly alliterative, consonant, and easy to remember)
The Grammar Grimace (I do grimace a lot, but would people think of a purple monster?)
Grinding Grammar (I'm no longer sure why I put this here)
Grinding Through Grammar (makes grammar into a horrible struggle)
Grammar Gripes (possibility; it captures my crotchetiness about grammar)
Grammar Gristle (similar to #5 above)
Grittier Grammar (but grittier than what?)
The Grammar Groin (satisfies MY sense of humor—welcome to my crotch)
Groovy Grammar (will people get the Army of Darkness reference?)
The Grammar Grope (deliberately pervy)
Grammar Grossness (possible? kinda' lame... Grammar Grotesquerie?)
Grotesque Grammar (this kinda represents my example sentences)
The Grammar Grotto (I expect an octopus hidden inside... or spiders, insects, etc.)
Grounded in Grammar (too damn academic)
Grouchy Grammar (or Grammar Grouch—a possibility?)
The Grammar Grouch (as above)
Grammar’s Grave (but I'm upholding grammar, not destroying it)
Grammar’s Grove (similar problem to Grotto)
The Grammar Growl (carping, complaining, possibly peristaltic, def. my attitude)
I started off leaning into the "grandpa" idea, but if I go with a grandpa-themed title, I'll have to change the alien illustration to something else (me as a grandpa?), and frankly, I like the alien and don't want to see him go. So "grandpa" was one of the first concepts to topple off the conveyor belt, however much it might fit me as an objectively old man. But after all that discussion about my book cover, it's obvious people don't want to see me on the cover.
How about something more self-deprecating like
The Grammar Twit
The Grammar Twat
?
Select from the above or generate your own better ideas.
How about The Grammar Grimoire? Yeah, it's geeky, so it's probably more my style than yours, but you are teaching grammar, which is kind of like magic to some people, so it makes sense. It also has those echoes of "grim" that appeal to your darker side.
ReplyDeleteOf the options you gave, I like "The Grammar Grouch" the best. It's apt and rolls off the tongue nicely.
(Apologies if you got two similar comments. I thought I submitted one earlier, but now I'm thinking that I navigated away from the page before hitting "publish." I'm chalking it up to my declining memory.)
I do like Grimoire. It's the same word in French as you can tell from the spelling. And I'm kind of kicking myself for not having put it on the list since it did float into—then back out of—my head. But I worry that Grimoire is a bit esoteric. That said, I will seriously consider it. It is really good as ideas go.
Delete...damn. There's an Instagram account called Grammar Grimoire. And another called The Grammar Grimoire. Let's explore my other options.
Grammar Grouch is also taken.
Grammar—Graceful and Gruesome—not taken.
Greasy, Grimy Grammar Guts—not taken.
Grammar Grief—taken.
Grammar Grievance—kind of taken (common phrase).
Grim Grammar—kind of taken (the phrase abounds).
Grimmer Grammar—definitely taken.
Grammar Gripes—taken.
The Grammar Groin—not taken.
Groovy Grammar—most definitely taken.
Grotesque Grammar—kind of taken.
Grouchy Grammar—taken.
The Grammar Growl—not taken.