postal scrotum: Mike D speaks!

My old friend, Mike D, wrote in response to these remarks I'd made re: Rudy Giuliani in a recent email. I wrote:

Rudy's the first candidate (?) I've ever been enthusiastic about. My slogan for him is, "If there's anyone on earth who deserves to have their finger on the button..."

I'm going to blog (badly) about this later, but I see Rudy's big weakness as his business and party ties. He made a big deal about how he didn't owe no one nuthin' as a GOP mayor of NYC, because he was surrounded by Dems who hadn't voted for him. Becoming president, though, will require a ton of GOP help, and he'll be beholden to all manner of righty special interests if he gets the Oval Office. That, I think, could be a problem.

Mike wrote in reply:

You're right, to win the Presidency Giuliani will have to make all sorts of deals with the Republican right. (I don't think we'll see him endorse Cuomo again anytime soon.) But where he will be beholden to righty interests, other Republican candidates will be eagerly embracing those righty interests. I think he'll still be the centrist, relatively speaking.

I think Rudy's greatest weakness as a candidate (not as President) is the likelihood of a corruption scandal. Recall that he recommended his former Police Commissioner Bernie Kerik to run Homeland Security for Bush's second term. Bush nominates him on Rudy's say-so and all of a sudden there's an avalanche of corruption stories on Kerik - misspent funds, misuse of police officers, cheating on the wife, etc. Unbelievably, all this stuff had escaped the New York press when the guy was actually commissioner. My nightmare scenario is Rudy will be cruising along in the middle of 2008 only to get absolutely crushed by a similar corruption scandal that cuts right to the heart of his crimefighter/leader reputation.

Things are going to get real interesting if Rudy gets the nomination. People are describing him as a centrist and I don't dispute that. But some people seem to make the leap that electing a centrist will help soothe the political vitriol of the last 15 years or so. Maybe. But keep in mind, this is the guy who had a building dropped on him and almost 2,500+ of his fellow New Yorkers killed on 9/11. If the guys responsible for that are still out there when he takes office, Rudy's going to make Bush look like Jane Fonda. I hope all the people hoping for reconciliation are ready for that. On the good side, we may see something akin to the Iranian hostages and Reagan's first inauguration. While Rudy's dancing at the Inaugural ball in DC, a Pakistani airliner may be touching down at JFK with Bin Laden's head in a box.

My rundown:

Rudy: Strong yes.

MCain: Sorry, can't forgive McCain-Feingold. Tramples the Bill of Rights. Plus, he's starting to come off like Dole in 96. When he starts referring to himself in the Third Person, I'll know he's done.

Romney: Possible. Convince me you actually want to win the wars: either the two small ones we have now or the big one that's coming, and we'll talk.

Hillary: What you said: "No"

Obama: Maybe someday. As someone described Obama's recent book, "My Lifetime in Politics: 18 Great Months"

Edwards: This guy cracks me up. I just can't take him seriously. Some hard core righties refer to him as "The Breck Girl". I can't say that I disagree.

Gore: No, but I'd love to see him get in.

Lieberman: Sure, but it's not happening.

Nader: Some people say why, I say why not.

What I find incredible is all this talk about Newt Gingrich. Folks, just drop it. Newt can't win, not in a million years. People still remember that this was the dickhead who shut down the federal government on Bill Clinton's watch. People tend not to forget those who act like petty tyrants, no matter their party affiliation. True-- Newt was a huge advocate of ideas that Clinton eventually stole appropriated, such as the balanced budget (an idea any housewife or -husband would advocate, I should think), but overall, I'd say that he is remembered fondly by, at most, a minority of the people-- all GOP, and all doe-eyed because he spearheaded the Republican Revolution, now effectively undone as of last year's congressional elections.

Plus, he's a shrimpy little bastard. I met him once in the State Department, long before he was a big name. No, it's not a long story-- the meeting was accidental; he was walking in while I was walking out. I shook his hand only because I'd been introduced to Newt by my companion, a gentleman who worked for Hispanic Magazine and was familiar with Gingrich.

We don't need a damn newt in the Oval Office. We need someone who's six-foot-twenty, fuckin' killing for fun.


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