All people who fear me
know not to come near--
I'll chop off your dingle
and feed it to deer!
My pants, oh, they're bulging
I'm pitching a tent
the hormones are raging:
have you fucked an Ent?
I'm mean and I'm nasty
I'm dark and I'm cruel
I'm Sauron the badass
so BOW TO ME, fool!
It's Orc groins for breakfast
and elf ass for lunch
then Warg dicks for dinner--
all tied in a bunch!
The oliphaunts cower
I give them a grin
then slip on a condom
of fiiiiine hobbit skin.
I vomit out darkness
and urinate bile--
I mete out destruction
and shit death in piles
The world is my oyster
it's my bearded clam
it's all mine to conquer
for SAURON I AM!
In honor of Peter Jackson and his team, who've garnered 11 (count 'em) Oscar nominations.
_
No comments:
Post a Comment
READ THIS BEFORE COMMENTING!
All comments are subject to approval before they are published, so they will not appear immediately. Comments should be civil, relevant, and substantive. Anonymous comments are not allowed and will be unceremoniously deleted. For more on my comments policy, please see this entry on my other blog.
AND A NEW RULE (per this post): comments critical of Trump's lying must include criticism of Biden's or Kamala's or some prominent leftie's lying on a one-for-one basis! Failure to be balanced means your comment will not be published.