Wednesday, May 19, 2021

farts

OK, so we have to talk about farting. Korean men are often notorious for farting if they think of themselves as the big cheese in the room. But here in the hospital, I get the impression that almost everyone feels permitted to fart.

So I've started farting along with them. I haven't heard a single nurse fart (they're all young girls), but older women taking care of their men fart almost as often as the men do. I have now joined the intestinal chorus, although I admit my farts are rather timid compared to some of the thunderous utterances I've heard.

It's liberating. Maybe we should bring this ethos to the office. A good fart every now and then would do us all a world of good. 

Possibly the funniest/most horrifying fart experience I've ever had in Korea involved the owner of a small company. This was years ago; I was in my twenties. I was supposed to do private work, and I had to be interviewed by the CEO. I recall sitting primly in a leather chair; the CEO sat across from me in an even more plush piece of furniture. At one point, while I was talking, he cut a massive fart that must've gone on for almost thirty seconds. The fart sounded like a toad being slowly impaled by a spear. The CEO obviously didn't care about farting in front of a prospective employee, but the worst part was how he maintained eye contact with me while I was trying to talk. I can never forget that experience. 

No one at the hospital has tried farting so aggressively, thank God. So I'll content myself with adding my little poots to the symphony of flatulence happening around me.



2 comments:

Daniel said...

The eye contact bit is unsettling. Think I'd be permanently traumatized from trying to remain serious in that context!

John Mac said...

Yeah, it really stinks when that happens...