Thursday, March 30, 2006

elbums

EFL Geek just posted a comment: "Your friend is a freak!" He goes on to wonder how my buddy Thomas St. John discovered his special gift, the elastic elbows.

Conjecture: Tom probably discovered it the same way most guys discover masturbation: through the magic of Vaseline and a nearby sheep.

You know-- most of us are actually capable of doing what Tom can do, but we have to use our scrotums. Tom was fortunate enough to be born with scrotums on his elbows, which makes his act somehow socially acceptable.

Meanwhile, thanks to irrational taboos, We the Scrotally Gifted languish in anonymity, our unconventional bartending skills untested. Because of American prudery, I am unable to stand before Carmen Electra with a ball sac full of wine and command, "Slake thy thirst, O Woman, from the limpid pool that lieth betwixt my stones!"

I have to know, EFL Geek-- how did the audience react, and who drank out of Tom's elbow? I told him he should try to get Leno, Asner, and Carmen Electra to drink out of it. Did they?


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2 comments:

Sean said...

Tom drank out of his own elbow via a straw - no audience shots, but Ed Asner was "titillated".

Anonymous said...

Asner's titties dillated? Ew....