You're Korean. You come into my restaurant, the Grammar Hut (name subject to change). You see from the signs and posters that you get a 10% discount for ordering in English. There's also a chance for you to get a 20% discount on your next order if you take and pass a grammar quiz, one that is different for every person and changes daily. You order in English, receive congratulations and your 10% discount, then eat your meal. After the meal, you go over to the carrel- or arcade-style booth to take the grammar test (maybe it's on a touch screen; maybe it's more old-school), which is relentlessly in English. A proctor is there to monitor that you're not cheating. You take the quiz and pass. You receive a chit with a QR code and instructions to go back to the counter and have it scanned. You're told not to throw the QR code away so it can be re-scanned the next time you come in to order your food and confirm your 20% discount. If, next time, you order in English and bring your QR code, you get a 30% discount. This cycle can repeat until you hit ten "passes" of the grammar test. Since you are scanned in and on record, if you take and pass the quiz ten times, you will get a 50% discount off your next order. At 100 "passes," it's a 60% discount off the next order.
The menu is good but eclectic. Basically, it's the shit I cook: burgers, shoestring fries, potato chips, Moroccan-inspired chicken, spaghetti, chili, chili dogs, lasagna, tacos, nachos, ddeokbokgi, gyros, boeuf bourguignon, various soups and stews (some Korean), breakfast items, and desserts (cakes, pies, cookies), maybe some keto selections. A happily varied menu that doesn't know what it wants to be when it grows up. Think: Silver Diner in the US. Or the Cheesecake Factory.
Does this sound like the start of a decent business model? Poke holes in my idea in the comments. This grammar-nerd stuff would probably work in Korea. Not so much in the States, where people just don't give a fuck.
Fantastic idea. Of course, it will be ripped off by bad copies the following week if you gain any financial traction and NO ONE will care about the quality of the ajoshi's grammar so long as the food is good. Buy I'll patronize your place until you end up like the owner of The Bamboo Lounge in Goodfellas...
ReplyDeleteIt's a unique idea, but like most businesses, success would likely be dependent on location. But if the food is good, folks might be willing just to bypass the discount and just enjoy their meal. Would that take the fun out of it for you?
ReplyDeleteAlso, what if a fat old foreigner comes in and orders in English? Will he get the discount? You probably wouldn't have to worry about him passing the test.