It's fading now, but this is part of a strange trend: I normally never remember the content of my dreams, but lately, I've been waking up in the morning with the details of a dream still clear in my head. I find this very disturbing.
This dream involved living in a home that I knew not to be my own house, but I thought of it as mine anyway—just a typical American suburban dwelling with carpeted floors and the works. An intruder who reminded me of Crispin Glover had broken in. Using a weapon that seemed a lot like an Exacto knife, I somehow managed to slash "Glover" deeply in several places. There was something satisfying about the knife's blade sinking into flesh. The blade cut perfectly; pulling it through flesh felt like pulling it through a thick block of Gouda. I don't recall that there was any noise at all during the struggle. "Glover" went down, right there on what was presumably the living-room rug. Some moments passed. My goddaughter came over and saw the body, and for whatever reason, we both agreed that I should go take a walk to clear my head. No sticking around and calling the police—we would just find a local trail and walk. The short hike proved to be pleasant enough, but there was a road crossing near the end that felt dangerous because I couldn't understand the weird timing of the traffic lights. At some point, my goddaughter left me; I guess her role in the dream was over. I got back to my place and considered calling the police... and that's when I noticed the body was no longer there, and the carpet had no blood on it. Everything was perfectly clean except for some telltale depressions in the rug, maybe footprints of some sort, as if a team had been at work in my living room. I felt a mounting sense of dread about what all of this might mean...
...and that's when I woke up, feeling dirty for having killed someone. I recall being flooded with relief that this had all been a dream, but there was still a lingering unease.
I'd like to go back to forgetting my dreams. What usually happens when I have an intense dream is that I'll wake up still feeling the dream's emotions but not remembering any details. This is a dream I'd rather forget.
Yeesh, that is disturbing. But I try not to read too much into dreams if I can help it.
ReplyDeleteI find that I generally remember dreams if I wake up in the middle of them. I'll often wake up in the middle of the night after a dream, but if I go back to sleep without doing anything about it, I'll have pretty much forgotten it by morning. And by "doing anything about it" I mean allowing my conscious mind to work through the dream and try to make sense of it. All I really need to do is just think back through the dream and go over the narrative in my head, and that is generally enough to imprint it on my memory, at least for the short term (and sometimes longer).
Case in point: I had a dream last week that I was traveling around some nameless European city with my brother. I saw a street going up a very steep hill and suggested we walk up it. My brother was hesitatant to do so, but I insisted. So we began walking up the street, and it got steeper and steeper the higher we went--to the point that I had to grab onto a railing and pull myself up to the top. I remember being terrified that I was going to lose my grip and fall, but we did make it to the top. There was a bench there at the very peak, right before the street fell off at an equally steep slope on the other side. My brother wrapped himself around the bench and held on for dear life; I flopped over the bench and just bawled my eyes out from the stress. That's when I woke up.
Hmm. Come to think of it, this sounds a lot like your previous dream, where you where going up that incline that got steeper and steeper. I think this is a fairly common dream motif--at least, it is for me. If I were inclined to "interpret" the motif, I would venture that it might say something about the dreamer's perception of the metaphorical road ahead getting more and more difficult, to the point where they fear not only that they may not be able to continue, but that they will fall and ultimately be defeated by the challenge.
Like I said, though, I try not to read too much into dreams.
So no "knives deeply penetrating squishy wounds" or things like that.
DeleteYeah, nothing like that. But you never know what might trigger a dream. It could be some random YT video you watched before going to bed. To be honest, given all the videos you watch of squirrel heads exploding, I'm surprised you don't have more bloody dreams.
DeleteThis is pedantic, but normally, it's squirrels that tend to get bulgy eyes when hit. It's the chipmunks that go all splattery. Softer skulls.
DeleteJust goes to show you that I don't watch those videos.
DeleteI put that dream through chatgpt and asked for a 4 word interpretation and it said 'Definitely a latent homosexual.' Make of that what you will, 'Crispin.'
ReplyDeleteMust be true, then!
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