Wednesday, April 07, 2004

Mixed Colostomy Bag Wednesday

The level of my commitment to the students of Seoul Women's University has officially increased: I took my first shit on campus today. Having quite literally left a piece of myself at the college, I am now karmically linked with the pulsating network of campus life. The bathroom in question was on the second floor of the Gu Gwahak Gwan-- the Old Science Building. It's nice to know that a women's university is inclusive enough to provide men's rooms; my search for a proper toilet took only moments.

Hats off to the very cute clerk at the Family Mart (sort of like a 7-Eleven) next to the #3 exit of Hwarang Dae Station. She had a great sense of humor when I slyly offered her a Japanese 5-yen piece to pay for the plastic bag.* Her store is one of the few that stocks one of my rare non-chocolate vices: Häagen-Dazs Strawberry Cheesecake ice cream. Not known for my moderation, I bought and promptly slew an entire pint. I'll have to go back to that store and see if they stock the new Guylian Praliné chocolate candy bar; not all stores stock the same items, you see. The only place I know of that sells Guylian bars is in Apkujeong.

[*These days, many convenience stores charge an extra 20 won if you want a plastic bag for your items. I think it's part of a larger recycling campaign. If you go to Kyobo or Youngpoong Bookstores, you'll notice something similar: the cashiers won't bag your purchases unless you specifically ask for a bag, and if you do ask for one, you'll probably have to pay about 500 won extra for it.]

Dr. Vallicella's been deconstructing me even further in his latest blog entries (I wish he had a blog that provided permalinks to individual entries; it'd be easier to link to). I still need to craft a reply to his reply, but as I said before, this is going to take time, and I'm at a disadvantage because I don't have a big enough philosophical vocabulary yet. I'm flattered that he currently has only two links on his blogroll: mine and KBJ of Analphilosopher. I can understand the KBJ link-- fellow conservative, fellow philosopher, but who the hell am I? I'm just a tiny brown floater in the cosmic septic tank.

Speaking of Dr. Burgess-Jackson, he has my thanks for once again providing a bit of an Anus-lanche with his reference to my tribute to my parents. I did find it amusing, however, that the post right below his Hominid post is titled "Meat-Eating and Rape." Lovely juxtaposition, that, and it confirms suspicions that KBJ's got his own perverse sense of humor.

Lorianne got the doctorate. No surprises here, but congratulations are in order. This evening I'll be attending a party in one of hell's lower circles to celebrate her achievement. Imagine me having disgusting monkey-sex with a bunch of minor demons. It'll be a very low circle of hell-- the kind where "a turd in the punchbowl" isn't a prank, but de rigueur.

The Buddha's birthday (Bu Ch'eo-nim ae Oh-shin Nal, the Day the Buddha Came [no snickering]; also known as Seok-ga T'an-shin Il, or Sakyamuni's Birthday) is May 26th; wanna help Andi and the Buddhist community make 600 lotus lanterns for Mu Sang Sa between now and then?

My favorite feminist, Camille Paglia, writes another incredible essay (via Drudge). When it comes to politics, she's nutty, she's all over the place-- but when she's on her home turf and talking about art, as she is here, she's more than just amusing: she's amazing. Camille's engaged in a crusade against PoMo bullshit. That in itself is reason to love her.

An IM conversation with the Air Marshal produced the following AM mini-rant:

BigHo: it's scary, the hyper-accelerated information age
AM: Hyper-accelerated information rocks!
AM: Download data faster than you can process it.
AM: 79 Tera-gigabytes of data!
AM: who gives a fuck if I have the ability to use it or not.
AM: Bandwidth and storage are the phallic metrics of the new century!
AM: you have a 30 gig hard drive?
AM: I need a 50 GIG HARD DRIVE!
BigHo: I should post your rant on the blog
AM: go for it.


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