Friday, August 06, 2004

Ode to Dorsal Titties

dorsal titties: The fatty protuberances on an overweight woman's back, approximately level with her shoulder blades or rib cage, and usually defined by bra straps. Generally visible to all. The male version of this is dorsal man-tits. Even slightly overweight people can sport dorsal titties.

[with apologies to Roy Orbison]

dorsal titties!
how you make me moan
dorsal titties!
my wooden floorboards groan
dorsal titties!
they're just like bacon
or maybe spam
I want to dig into your ham
(tasty)

...


[leaving Orbison for BigHo country now...]

are they particle?
are they wave?
how do dorsal titties behave?
can they freeze?
do they thaw?
can I grab 'em and eat 'em raw?

I want dorsal titties that snap!
I want dorsal titties with verve!
I want dorsal titties that roll!
Let me suffocate inside those curves!

give me a Rubenesque patty melt
give me a woman with five ass cracks
dorsal titties sold by the pound
give me the taste of my favorite snacks

Amen.

_

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