Wednesday, January 10, 2007

postal scrotum: on the Bible and farts

Apologies for Blogger's "scheduled service outage" earlier on.

Max writes:


Here's another for your blog. (By the way, apparently no one has given us any feedback on my missive concerning the reporting of violence in Korea. Or do I need to look in a certain place?)

Thanks for your interesting post on interpreting the Bible and the Corsair link (and the links on the Corsair's blog, too!).

Your post was timely because, reading the Corsair's post, I was reminded of a recent conversation with a devoutly Christian friend of mine. During our discussion about the Bible and religion, she affirmed her immensely strong faith in God. On the other hand, I said that while I do hold true to some kind of spirituality, I don't believe in a Christian God per se.

My friend takes the Bible literally and she roundly dismissed my belief that the Bible is meant to be allegory. In her opinion, the Bible is to be interpreted literally. She used inane reasoning when she told me, "Now, one plus one equals two. Just because you don't agree with that fact doesn't make it untrue." How ironic that she was using scientific logic to make an unscientific assertion (namely that the Bible is the word of God).

I didn't even bother arguing with her, because I knew I wouldn't get anywhere. When I had earlier asked, "Why would a supreme being like God ask Abraham to sacrifice his son? What's the point in causing such human suffering?" she responded, "God says that His ways are often beyond man's ken." What a neat little trick she used to explain away all the illogical aspects of the Bible.

Anyhow, I hope you enjoyed that story.

To end on a different note, seeing as how you're the self-acknowledged Master Blaster of Flatulation, I have a new phenomenon to report to you (it's new to me, anyway). For a while now, I've been on a bodybuilding diet, which means multiple meals per day, which consequently translates into more gas. In addition, I seem to have developed a nasal allergy, which means I can now sneeze anywhere, anytime. Well, sometimes, I am unfortunate enough to sneeze while farting. And boy, let me tell you, it hurts like a bastard at the nether end.

Yours faithfully,



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