O do not sixty-nine and fart
for you may break your lover's heart
of all travails we must embrace
the worst is gas blown in the face
the buttock cheeks, whose false allure
produces rancid devil-spoor
they quiver now in evil mirth
as they prepare a vap'rous birth
O turn aside! O turn aside!
do not accept the hellspawn ride
through noxious nimbus, anus-flame
through 'bominations yet unnamed
beware the crack, beware the gas
beware the leprous, treach'rous ass
beware the butt hair, maiden fair
beware demonic derrières
O do not sixty-nine and fart
for you may break your lover's heart
_
Thursday, February 28, 2013
a romantic pome
6 comments:
READ THIS BEFORE COMMENTING!
All comments are subject to approval before they are published, so they will not appear immediately. Comments should be civil, relevant, and substantive. Anonymous comments are not allowed and will be unceremoniously deleted. For more on my comments policy, please see this entry on my other blog.
AND A NEW RULE (per this post): comments critical of Trump's lying must include criticism of Biden's lying on a one-for-one basis! Failure to be balanced means your comment will not be published.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Superb! Although I find the opening/closing couplet to be somewhat lackluster compared to the meaty center of the poem.
ReplyDeleteStill, it is the finest poem I have ever read on the dangers of flatulence while 69ing.
(Also to consider is the position of your delicate parts... should the sudden release of gas startle your lover, the result could be far worse than a broken heart.)
But you can't deny that those couplets, lackluster though they be, set the stage.
ReplyDelete"Oh do not . . ." especially if you're Superman.
ReplyDeleteJeffery Hodges
* * *
I've written poems - among the list
ReplyDeleteAre sonnets about having pissed
Or suffering from itchy butts
Or warheads growing near my nuts.
But none among them is so fine
As this verse about farting and 69.
Ave, Kevin!
It's amazing that you're still single.
ReplyDeleteI know, right?
ReplyDelete