Friday, February 15, 2013

from Chris Dorner's manifesto

Hillary Clinton. You’ll make one hell of a president in 2016. Much like your husband, Bill, you will be one of the greatest. Look at Castro in San Antonio as a running mate or possible secretary of state. He’s (good people) and I have faith and confidence in him. Look after Bill. He was always my favorite President. Chelsea grew up to be one hell of an attractive woman. No disrespect to her husband.

Gov. Chris Christie. What can I say? You’re the only person I would like to see in the White House in 2016 other than Hillary. You’re America’s no shit taking uncle. Do one thing for your wife, kids, and supporters. Start walking at night and eat a little less, not a lot less, just a little. We want to see you around for a long time. Your leadership is greatly needed.

Still no official word on whether the body found in the burning cabin belongs to ex-LAPD officer Chris Dorner. I've been slogging my way through Dorner's 23-page manifesto; I'm on page 19 right now. In the previous pages, Dorner spent some column-inches saying his goodbyes and paying his respects to people who have had a formative influence on his life: friends, drill instructors, commanding officers, fellow cops.

I find this manifesto riveting, despite its many typos and gaffes. It really is a window into Dorner's headspace. At one point, Dorner argues fervently in support of an assault-weapons ban and decries the loss of innocent life during the mass shootings of the past year, never quite acknowledging the irony that he plans to use powerful weaponry to stalk and kill cops and their innocent loved ones. At another point, Dorner, who knows that he's on the path to self-destruction, wryly notes:

It’s kind of sad I won’t be around to view and enjoy The Hangover III. What an awesome trilogy. Todd Phillips, don’t make anymore Hangovers after the third, takes away the originality of its foundation. World War Z looks good and The Walking Dead season 3 (second half) looked intriguing. Damn, gonna miss shark week.

This is crazy, crazy stuff. If you haven't read Dorner's manifesto for yourself, you should.


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