pudding!!

My buddy Mike asked me what I wanted for my birthday, and I told him I wanted a shoebox full of Jell-O Sugar-free Chocolate Pudding, which is awesome. It doesn't taste unsweetened at all. I was having trouble finding the 59-gram box of it, though, which is why I turned to Mike, and he came through for me—big-time. The box that arrived from America wasn't a shoebox (Mike didn't take my request that literally), but it was big, and it contained twenty boxes of pudding, so I'm set for the next little while. (Set? Get it? Pudding has to set? Oh, fuck off—you know that was funny, dammit.)

You make the pudding with milk, and it firms up in five minutes (unlike Jell-O gelatin, which takes 4 hours, or 3 if you're impatient, as I often am). Now, the keto diet, which I'm on, frowns on the use of skim milk (skim milk has little to no fat, but keto is a high-fat diet, so you're better off with whole milk or heavy cream, especially heavy cream, which is calorific but very low in carbs), and that means I have the pleasure of making my pudding with whole milk and maybe some heavy cream thrown in. The cream adds calories, but not carbs.

I specifically wanted the 59-gram box because that makes 3 cups of pudding. There's an easier-to-find 39-gram box that makes 2 cups' worth of pudding; I didn't want that. I want my 3 cups. Mike tried several stores, and I think he said Wal-Mart had what I wanted in the end. Bless you, Wal-Mart! And many thanks to Mike for making me one happy addict.