Monday, March 27, 2006

as if you didn't know this already

My coworker Z, that ray of sunshine, conveyed the horrifying news with an evil giggle: her class had determined that I was the least manly of the three male foreign English teachers. I told my colleagues: "It's probably my large breasts."

But no-- the determining factor was, surprisingly, not the mantits.

It was my professed love of cooking.

Cooking, you see, is for people without a pair. Cooking is feminine. And that, folks, is the perception at one of South Korea's largest bastions of feminism.

I think I'll go cut off my dick and burn it in a public place.

UPDATE: I should note that the above female body in the Photoshopped image belongs to none other than Melissa Theuriau, the hot French newscaster whose image is all over the Net. Props to My Pet Jawa for showing me the way to her topless pics.



Anonymous said...

Yeah, but they dig the cooking, right? It's considered an asset and doesn't detract from how women percieve a man I would think, but is this not the case?

Kevin Kim said...


Alas, it is my own ugly mug. I do do a mean Bill Clinton impression, though.


Yes, they dig the cooking. Because Z is a female teacher, the girls in her classes get carried away doing girly things like talking about other teachers.

I don't encourage even remotely negative talk about other teachers in my classes; to the contrary, I usually defend colleagues when a rare student utters a complaint, however politely phrased the complaint might be.

The only area where I poke fun is in the realm of accents, because we're a pretty linguistically diverse group of anglophones. Even here, though, I'm sure to note that Europeans often make fun of the nasal American accent. In that way, I keep things balanced. Whether this is appreciated is another matter.

Anyway, I thought the "manliness" thing was amusing enough to blog.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go shopping for pink thongs. Summer is coming, you know.


Anonymous said...

Thank you for that lovely image. Now excuse me while I go scrub my brain with a brillo pad.

And as for cooking, I thought it was all the rage in Korea for men to cook. Or is that a metrosexual thing?

Whatever the case, don't do anything rash with your johnson. You may need it someday.