Wednesday, May 13, 2015

The Wind That Wins

"Just blow it out your ass," she said
And so I did: right on her head
I grunted, pushed with all my heart
And gave birth to a massive fart
That fried my lover's fulsome hair
Her self-respect blew everywhere
But that was not the end of it—
My ass moved on to greater shit:
It belched tornadoes and typhoons
It broadcast gerbils and baboons
A cornucopia sublime
An unrelenting storm of slime
It vomited a cable car
It hiccuped out a neutron star
It cannoned out a galaxy
It sired seven deities
And finally, my ass did pause
From violating Nature's laws
When all was calm and all was right
I looked into the starry night
I saw the cosmos I had made
And just for once, was not afraid
But then, like terror from within
A distant rumble, then a din
My heart did beat with mounting dread
I felt a pounding in my head
For know this: after every fart
There comes a Worm, whose frightful art
Is overwhelming man and beast
And spreading shite from west to east
It thundered now, began to boom
The shart that meant the planet's doom
I'd birthed a cosmos from my ass
But now I knew: this, too, shall pass
So this is where I say goodbye
The Worm, the dreaded Worm, is nigh!