Wednesday, April 10, 2024

what's wrong with this picture?

I'm trying to imagine Gordon Ramsay's reaction:

I deliberately stuck my fork in like that, and it held in place.

I don't expect five-star service from the hospital, which put me on its "Western" menu without even asking me. (I suppose I could request a change, but I've had the hanshik menu before, and it's just the Korean version of bland.) But any way you slice it, the above hunk of meat is a Donald Trump steak: dry, tough, well done, and looking as if it had been thoroughly microwaved. So far, the hospital food I've received hasn't been horrible, but tonight's dinner might represent a first. I would frankly prefer badly cooked chicken or fish to what I had this evening. 

ADDENDUM: I confess that I've inflicted this quality of protein on people who deserved better in the past. The first time was when I brought a bunch of cooked chicken breast to my buddy Mike's house. His wife prepped it for dinner, and the breast was hard and dry. I watched everyone sawing into their meat with so much effort and felt very guilty. The breast had been fine when I'd originally cooked it, but through improper storage or the passage of time, it had changed into something mean. Maybe I should have suggested shredding it and mixing it up with mayonnaise, nuts, and dried cranberries. The second time I failed spectacularly with proteins was in 2018 in France: I'd been given a day to cook something for the family, so I wanted to do galbi and fried rice. We went shopping for Korean-style short ribs, but the butcher hadn't heard of this cut before, even after I showed him a picture from my phone. So he gave me some sort of entrecôte or côtelette, and I completely mistreated the meat, cooking it for too short of a time. The fried rice, luckily, came out fine, but the meat was a disaster, and everyone was too polite to say anything as they, too, had difficulty sawing their way through the tough fibers. I doubt they'll ever let me cook for them again. 



5 comments:

Daniel said...

Looks more like a brownie than steak. Hope you're getting outta dodge soon!

Kevin Kim said...

I think I'm going to be here for at least a week. I can expect another W3 million bill after insurance.

The Maximum Leader said...

For what it is worth, I don't recall the overcooked chicken. Put it out of your mind. We all overcook things from time to time. That steak is really really done. Yikes. I hope you are out of there very soon.

Charles said...

Yikes. Man, I hope things are OK.

John Mac said...

I just read yesterday that our "friends" at the CDC are recommending all meats be prepared well-done so as to stop the spread of bird flu. I shit you not.