Sunday, March 26, 2017

the Styxhexenhammer666 drinking game

If you're a regular viewer of the Styxhexenhammer666 channel, as I seem to have become, you'll have noticed that Styx (whose real name is apparently Tarl) is generally a well-spoken individual, but he's not perfect: among his verbal quirks are (1) a tendency to mispronounce certain words or expressions, and (2) a tendency to overuse—or at least to reuse—certain pet phrases, some of which are rather idiosyncratic. So why not make a drinking game out of these verbal tics, right?


You'll need three degrees of alcohol: beer, some midrange drink, and very high-end booze (i.e., super-strong and super-expensive). Let's call these, from weakest to strongest, First Degree, Second Degree, and Third Degree.

Next, you and your group will need to watch one of Styx's most recent videos so that none of you knows what's going to come out of Styx's mouth. If you go back through Styx's video archive, you might already know the content well enough to know what's going to be said.


Take a drink of First Degree whenever you hear any of the following:

"something like that"
"something along those lines"
"things of that nature"
"how in the hell"
"why in the hell"
"fuck" or "fucking"
"neo-con" or "neo-cons"
"shill," "shills," or "shilling"
any rhetorical question beginning with "What" or "Why" or "Do you (really) think"
any mention of Rand Paul (sometimes mentioned simply as "Rand")
any mention of "John McLame"

Take a drink of Second Degree whenever you hear any of the following:

"overarcing" (when Styx means "overarching")
"the gig is up" (when Styx means "the jig is up")
"Angela Merkel" pronounced incorrectly with a soft "g"
"figger," "figgering," or "figgered" instead of "figure" (dialect)
misusing the word "denigrate" (which means "criticize, belittle, disparage," not "damage" or "undermine," as Styx often uses the word)

Take a drink of Third Degree whenever you hear any of the following:

"a shit-fuck" (do not drink First Degree because of the "fuck" in "shit-fuck")
any moment when Styx says "Mmm" after drinking something on camera

When you finish one video, queue up another and keep playing until one of you vomits and/or faints. This person is the first loser. The winner of the game is the last one not to puke or faint.

(This is all in good fun, Styx. We all have verbal quirks.)


TheBigHenry said...

Interesting game premise, Kevin. IMHO, however, the first "loser" is actually the first winner. I don't see getting falling-down drunk as a win. But, then again, I don't see a panty raid as a big deal either. Must be some age-related thing ... :)

Charles said...

Personally, I would suggest getting hammered before even starting the video. It will make the whole process a lot easier.

Kevin Kim said...


I don't do drinking games precisely because I agree with you as to who counts as a winner and who counts as a loser. But I designed this game to be consistent with other drinking games, so there we are.


That might make life much more interesting.

TheBigHenry said...


Of course, when I was a freshman in college, I had to get falling-down drunk (I have no idea how I got back to my dorm room) with a bunch of my colleagues at an off-campus bar. Just to find out how it feels. It felt awful, especially the next day (and the day after, too). I never did that again, so that was a definite plus in my life.