Tuesday, March 27, 2007

ultimatums delivered

I told my students-- as gently and humorously as I could-- about the Gandhi Diet both yesterday and today. I have no idea how disquieted they are by this diet. I suspect they won't care much until Week 7 or 8, when the inevitable absences will begin to take their toll on my Jabba-like figure. Because the classes vary in size, I have had to establish different thresholds for each class. For example, in a class of five people, a single absence is all right, but if only three people show up, then the threshold has been passed and I will have to starve that day. In a class of eight people, I will allow two absences, and so on. Will this keep the students coming to class? Will it cause me to look like a stick? Stay tuned!

POST SCRIPTUM: Yesterday was the official beginning of Gandhiness. Both yesterday and today, students showed up in sufficient numbers to keep me eating.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

After a while I see a pattern arising. Too few students attend, Kevin starves for a day. Enough students attend, Kevin binges for a day. Kevin's blood sugar is so volatile, he begins to act erratically. His posts on his blog start to really get out there and his readers are thoroughly entertained. One of Kevin's coworkers pleads with Kevin's students to attend so that their teacher will stay sane as Kevin, with crazed look in his eyes, gnaws on the desk. One student films it on her cell phone, uploads it and Kevin's ferality becomes grist for both Korean and Caucasian eugenists. Good luck with this. I have to hand it to you -- it takes serious balls or unhealthy amounts of masochism to be willing to subject yourself to pain based on the virtue of immature students.