Monday, April 09, 2007



According to Mike, the Korea Tourism Office has, with the help of a fuzzy little furriner named Simon Anholt, produced its new, tourism-friendly attempt at rebranding, a bizarrely constructed, two-word abortion of a slogan:

"Korea, Sparkling!"

The slogan claws at your eyes and brutally pinches the nipples of your brain. It's like a German shepherd chewing on your anus while you're in mid-shit. For any 21st-century anglophone, it immediately conjures up a sneering cynicism and invites all manner of caustic parodies:

"Anus, Sparkling!"
"Titties, Suckling!"
"Buttocks, Fondling!"
"Scrotum, Thrumming!"

It also calls to mind the campy dialogue associated with old superhero comics: "Super strength... fading... must... reach... lever..." It's not a long leap from that to "Korea... sparkling... must... resist... urge... to suck... own... dick..."

I do hope the Korea Tourism Office sees its way clear to revising this slogan. Enough minds have been traumatized already. And this country deserves better. Much better.

Come to think of it, why the hell does Korea need an English slogan? Make a Korean one, I say!



The Goat said...

Ugh...I work in the Tourism Faculty at my university so I pray that this does not ever come up - or I may have to lie.

I think they shit the bed by making the "Soul of Asia" specific for Seoul...not a big stretch to apply that for the whole country.

Maven said...

... speaking of super heroes... I have a post devoted to the Fantastic Four, of which I am eagerly awaiting your attention:)