challenged to a fight

I'm afraid the rumors are true: I disparaged the Mixed Martial Arts tournaments (Ultimate Fighting, Pride, etc.) as bullshit and have been challenged to a fight at an MMA gym in Korea by commenter "william" [sic]. I have accepted the challenge and have offered to film the fight. Now it's just a matter of waiting until william comes to Korea to kick my ass.

You can read the amazing exchange between me and william here. Notice how it started off innocently enough, with me praising Matt Damon's hard work training in krav maga, which I correctly described as an Israeli martial art. This was too much for william, who politely asserted, "'Israeli martial art krav maga' my ass." He then proceeded to explain that any true martial art wouldn't involve dishonorable techniques like penis-grabbing (!) and so on. I rightly pointed out that most martial arts teach these "dishonorable" techniques, and noted that fighting for money isn't exactly honorable, if honor is the issue.

william seems obsessed with the word "honor," but he obviously has no understanding of the word as it's used by serious martial artists. Most major schools teach that you don't disparage the other fighting styles. Of course, this precept is violated routinely, and inter-dojo fights have taken place, and still do, as people compete for the sake of "face." But honorable martial artists are taught that violence is always the last option, that you don't just pick fights out of the blue, and that you don't bray about your own prowess or wear stupid pride on a sleeve. william, by contrast, charged into the Nomad's comment thread in a rude and crass manner, invited Your Humble Narrator to fight him when he's next in Korea, and worst of all, failed to understand my basic point, which wasn't to insult the various martial arts themselves, but to note that MMA tournaments don't settle the questions they claim to settle-- namely, Which fighting style is best?

It's been ages since I've been in a real fight, but I'm not about to pussy out because of one insecure, overcompetitive guy's challenge. Anyway, have fun reading the exchange for yourselves. We might get a cool MPEG out of all this as william arrives in Korea for the Hominid beatdown. Yes!

UPDATE: In a possibly-related move, Sperwer sends me a link to an article about how to lose your man-tits.


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