Friday, March 17, 2023


I'm from northern Virginia, which technically makes me a Southerner since my commonwealth is below the Mason-Dixon Line (what Robin Williams called "the Manson-Nixon Line"), except most other Virginians don't see northern Virginia (Alexandria, Fairfax, Arlington, etc.) as real Virginia because of its proximity to DC. Real Virginian or not, I can relate to a lot that's in the above video, and I'm pretty sure that plenty of Northerners can, too. Swamp butt? Weird, dangerous insects landing on you (we have big ol' horseflies in NoVA)? Cranking the A/C to $1000-a-month levels? Check, check, and check. At one point, our backyard even had the dusty bald spots you see in the above video. Although I have to say that what's worse than the bald spots is mowing the lawn under the apple tree without picking up the apples first. Great way to attract wasps although, really, that's more of a fall thing. Still, the mowing doesn't stop just because autumn has arrived.

Best solution for swamp butt? Tie a tee shirt around you and let the long part drape over your ass. If you sweat through that, well... there's no helping you.

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